Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Good Times in Vegas!


I won a lot of money in Vegas one time...cock fights...seems I have a talent for spotting the cock with the most fire in its eye. Most people look at the belly or the claws, but I would go into the pens before the fight and take a deep look into the cock's eyes...wait until I saw that special glint that told me that that cock was a fucking killer. Then I would drug his opponent and bet a bundle on the killer cock to win.

So after one particularly bloody cock killing that netted me a small fortune I decided to spend it like a big shot, cause bouncing from buffet to buffet and shit ass strip club to low rent brothel just didn't carry the same thrill it once had. I guess all pleasure wears thin after awhile, like an oft used condom. I think Shakespeare said that, the faggot.

So as I lay in my suite's jacuzzi, my chest covered in Fluff, a whore passed out on the toilet, I thought it would be fun to engage in an act of deviance no one ever had before, not even well known reprobates like Nixon and Joan of Arc, the famous french sodomite.

So I woke up the whore by squirting Crest up her nose, (she got a big laugh out of that, good sense of humor on that broad), and I told her my plan. She was amenable once the finances were ironed out.

I gave her 1500 hundred bucks to marinate her hand in liquid heroin overnight, and at dawn, while I ate my cereal infused with Omega 3's, she promised to give me a vigorous handjob with her H imbued fist. Has anyone ever gotten a 1500 dollar handjob before? Maybe a world class fucking idiot or Kublai Khan, but I doubt it.

She was used to being strung out so she was keen to see how fucked up she could get dipping her fingers in heroin for 24 hours, and I was curious to see her choke my cock with a drug fueled fist. Should I have expected her to die?

What do I look like a doctor? Her limp fingers did eventually stiffen but I must conclude her handjob sure wasn't worth 1500 bucks. I rolled her into the tub and flushed, abandoning dreams of a post wack job blumpkin, and headed for the strip, hoping to catch the last act at Circus Circus before the swarms of white trash made that shithole a nightmare too horrific to enter.